Loss

Today I learned that my college roommate has lost her husband to a long battle with bladder cancer. They have three beautiful children. A few years ago, another friend lost her husband just shy of their one year anniversary. A few friends have divorced and mourned in a different way. Several of my friends have lost children - either before they ever had a chance to live, or after too short a time on this earth.

All of them handled their losses with more grace than I could ever muster. All of them continued to care for their families, put on brave faces and comfort those around them. All of them inspire me.

As for my college roommate, she is one of my favorite people. It has been years since we've seen each other, but a place in my heart will forever be hers. I ache for her sadness.

And, as weird as this sounds, I am so proud of her.

The family hosted a website to keep us informed. Entry after entry, friends wrote about her hospitality and generosity in sharing his last days with those who loved him. I could tell from the emails that she was doing everything she could to make his last days joyful and memorable for all - especially their children.

As a mother and wife, I draw from the inspiration of others. And, I could not be in better company. My extended family of strong women are amazingly powerful, compassionate, creative, intelligent, generous and kind.

I am learning more and more that loss is a part of this journey, but it still jars me and knocks me off balance when it happens. And, I am on the outskirts of the pain.

I guess I just wanted to write a tribute to you all who have felt such deep and life changing sadness. I am moved by your strength and so grateful for the hapiness you have found.

Loyally - MS