Ruckus!

It is a busy time for the happy Stones....all of the normal ruckus plus new activities like ballet classes and mud runs! Sure, why not! In between all of this fun, the kids swing from vines in the pool. Never a dull moment!

First Words

Where is my flip cam when I need it? Really, I have no idea where it is right now. But the precious moments continue without being captured.......which brings me to the blog this morning.

I enjoyed Lily's first words and baby babble so much. Her tiny voice communicating in this big world was precious. My favorite is still the way she said "I Love You" = "I ya youuuu". I mean, what is better than that?

Fast forward to today and we have another toddler speaking his mind. Similar little voice. Same adorable memories! Ben gives the ABCs a try, sings along with melodies and warms your heart with the best "Halo" = Hello. Precious!

Without even noticing, Lily's babble turned in to real words, real thoughts, real feelings. So I am relishing in the tid bits of language Ben is sharing with us these days! For now I can translate the babble to be whatever I want it to be. But in an instant, he will be telling me exactly what HE wants to say!

Ben's First Words:

Halo - Hello

Bebe - Baby

Waa - Water

Owsigh - Outside

Iss - Izzy

Teeter - Sister

Baba - Grandpa

Ah Duh - All done

Freedom.

There are not many opportunities to give our kids the freedoms we remember from our childhood. So when I think Ihave found one, I offer it up to them. Running naked in Grandma's backyard. Jumping on the beds. And sitting in the front seat when we are cruising through the neighborhood.

Lily takes swimming lessons at the neighborhood pool. And we have a deal. If she promises to follow the rules during class, she can break a rule on the way home and sit in the front seat. Don't tell the police.

This week, she was a swimming super star! A brave little fish. And of course she rode up front - even sticking her head out the window.

I caught her reflection in the side-view mirror - total joy. Her curls were blowing in the wind. Sun kissing her cheeks. Eyes and mouth wide open, catching the breeze. She was in heaven.

I wish I had more of these moments to give her - where life's simple pleasures are as good as a little fresh air and tunes blaring on the radio. Life feels a little more complicated these days. But the moments do happen - and I am so grateful when I am there to share them with her.

A few moments of freedom thanks to Aunt Connie:

I am a BIG fan of anything with a drive thru.

Restaurants.

Dry cleaners.

Pharmacies.

Why not a zoo!

About 45 minutes up the road, we found the Lazy Five Ranch, nicknamed the "lazy zoo." Not sure what to expect, we loaded up and headed out for a little adventure. That is exactly what we got, and a belly ache from laughing so hard!

With buckets of food in our hands, we rolled down the windows. Think to yourself, "if you feed them, they will come." Right into your car! Ostriches in the windows, pigs under the car, buffalo nosing at the doors.

The only thing funnier than the chaos in our car, was watching it happen to all the cars in front and in back of us!

Once we finally got the hang of this "zoo" we really enjoyed the close up view of all the animals. Ben and Lily fed them, spoke to them, touched them, kissed them (oh yeah!). We toured the ranch, took in the sites, cleaned up with at least 500 sani-wipes....and headed back to the zoo I call home!

Enjoy the pics -- it was a really fun adventure!

Birthday Week.

This week will be full of details as we prepare for Lily's birthday. The birthday fairy dropped off this letter tonight, as well as a few gifts for next weekend. She is really on it!

In a new place

(Buck and kids starting their coin collection)

Aren't we always in a new place? Life doesn't stand still for any of us. Yes, my family is literally in a new place, but no matter the address, everyday seems to bring something new, something to figure out. I am reminding myself to be patient in all this newness. Familiarity and routine will come in time. So will friends and favorite restaurants and a hairdresser I can trust. All in time.

In addition to our new address - that I still have to look up sometimes to remember - the kids bring something new to our world everyday. Lily learning to swim. Ben leaning to talk. And some of my other new favorites:

- kids fighting over toys or chasing the dog in circles around the house

- Lily teaching Ben how to "float" in the bath tub (you have to see it to believe it)

- Ben brushing his teeth and reading "boos" (books)

- Lily coloring masterpieces and trying yoga poses

- Ben rubbing noses with me

- Lily baking muffins

- Ben digging by "bas" in the backyard (bugs)

I never know what I am going to get. Every day is new. And I love it - when I remember to stop and love it!

Change.

Oh, the pressure of writing my first post from our new home in North Carolina....especially tonight, after a long weekend (heck, a long three months!). I come to the computer tonight only because this fourth of July weekend was full of so many moments that I just have to capture somehow and this is the best place I know to record the history of my family.

I owe you tales of our chaotic move and first days of school and work....but I might never to get to that! Instead, I bring you a few pics (more than a few) from our recent celebrations - Fathers Day at the ballpark, grandma's recent visit, a trip to the kid's museum, backyard fun and fourth of July in Blowing Rock.

As the fireworks go off outside the window, I am thankful that this weekend was full of perfect summer moments for the kids -- pink lemonade, homemade blueberry icing, rolling down hills, running across the lawn with fairy wings and magic wands, itchy skin from playing in the grass. All the good stuff. As for mom and dad, we got a few quiet sips of coffee on Grandma's back porch. What more can I ask for?

Happy birthday America

Marcey Stone, Out.

Today I will go to my office for the last time. I've dragged this moment out to the very last moment possible because I just don't know how I will really say goodbye. My work - the intangible and tangible of it all - is like a part of me, and extension of who I am. I have walked into the same door, sat in the same chair, pounded away on the same computer for nearly 11 years. I am as comfortable there as I am anywhere. I know the sounds, smells, faces - the back roads, if you will, to get just about anything done. It's a huge part of my story.

Bayfront has been a place of achievement and failure for me. Success and frustration. Awards. Mistakes. Growth and Opportunity. Hallway chit-chat. Closed door meetings. Planning, executing, measuring, perfecting, managing, budgeting, reporting, writing, editing....too many "ings" to list them all! On the good days and bad, this place provided me opportunities to hone my talents and ultimately move on to the next big challenge. For that I am grateful.

Beyond the work that had to be done, there are the people and the memories that will live on in my heart. At last count, twenty people have come and gone in our department during my tenure. Five advertising agencies and countless partners and vendors. They will be part of my virtual scrapbook forever. They were the first to see my engagement ring, wedding photos, sonogram images and to hold my babies. They overheard good news and arguments. They watched me diet and run, only to pig-out on junk food and snacks from the physician's lounge. We've shared many salads from the cafeteria and TMI has been discussed around the round table. Lessons shared on everything from relationships to parenting, fashion, movies, dreams, regrets, the future, the past - and everything in between! I learned the life boils down to one golden rule - "Don't ever do his laundry!"

So in my "Ode to Bayfront" I want to say thank you for helping me to become a successful communicator and the kind of manager I hoped I would be. Thank you for teaching me every discipline in our field - from strategy to creative executions, I've had the chance to do it all. And, thank you for providing me a wonderful collection of people over the years who delivered great work, passion, commitment, professional pride -- and above all else acted excited every time I shared a story about my children! You are my "teal"! Teal is the deal, baby!

A House, Our Home

With ten days left in our life as we know it, the emotion of the move has finally caught up to me. I've been in robot mode checking logistics off the list, laser focused on the end goal. But a quiet moment in the kids' room set off a chain of tears that I think will continue intermittently over the next several weeks! I knew they would catch up to me. Darn those tears!

So in honor of the emotions behind the tears, I've decided to take to the blog as a place to document all of this craziness......the building up to this huge family transition. So here goes.

Ode to The Townhouse!

They say you never really own your home, that in the end it only belongs to you until it belongs to someone else. That is true. But my house is a home. And every home I've ever lived in is with me for good, in some way. My childhood home, dorm room, sorority house, first condo and this home - 340 fourth street south!

As much as I have complained about the complexities of living in the city, this house had me from hello. I fell for it completely. We've had a love/hate relationship for nearly 7 years, but my heart lives in these walls. We've got a thing going on!

While rocking Ben last night I felt this urge to touch the walls, rest my forehead on the cool surface. If only I could lay my palm on the light green walls, I could absorb the countless number of memories made here. I wanted to drink up the silence of the room and the light pouring through the window. I wanted to be full of the familiar surroundings and smells that have become my life. I wanted to remember everything, like.....

The way the palm trees rustle outside the french doors when a warm breeze blows;

the lights of the city that peek above the tree tops;

the sound of the washer and dryer humming on sunday afternoons;

the creek of the hardwood floor planks - the one right next to the couch;

the warmth of the carpet where Izzy likes to rest;

the sound of little feet running to our bedroom every morning;

the echo of our neighbors' voices through our shared walls;

the tree outside the kid's window, home to two birds and a squirrel;

the closets i share with my children's' toys;

the warmth of our half bath, always the warmest room in the house.

I was bombarded by memories of insignificant moments. Laying in my room reading a book. Painting a table. Baking really bad brownies. Unloading the dishwasher. And then, the big stuff came at me.

The big fight. The big make up. The news that changed my life. The challenges I thought I could not face. The victories I knew I would achieve. The tears that would not stop. The laughter that soon followed. The nights I could not sleep. The naps that filled me up. The planning and figuring-it-out. The aha moments. The packing. The homecomings. The big decisions. The disappointments. The learning curves. The milestones. The email that started all of this.......

I have a spot in this house. Actually outside this house.

At 2 p.m. the sunlight on our courtyard is perfect. I like to sit there and let the sun warm my shoulders, ease away my worries. It's been my little getaway for 7 years. I remember laying there chatting with my sister-in-law one day, totally unaware that I was pregnant with Lily. We found out a few days after. 9 months later I would lay in that spot praying for the sunlight to soak up my post partum depression. I would watch the clouds roll by in a heavy fog. It was on that spot that I stretched after my first three-mile run. And where my husband would leave notes for us written in chalk. This past weekend I sat in a wedge of sunlight on that same spot watching my two naked children play in the hose. It will be right there that I sit and offer up a quiet prayer the morning we leave for North Carolina. It is my spot.

Thank you 340 Fourth Street for holding in all these memories. Oh, if your walls could talk! You welcomed us as newlyweds and as new parents. You sheltered my babies and provided them room to cry and crawl and cackle. You gave us a place to gather for dinner and quiet rooms to rest our heads.

I am taking you in and letting you go. I have a new home to meet. New memories to make. And you have new dwellers moving in soon. Take good care of them, I know you will. And, I will be back.....we still own you, you know!

Birthday Fly By!

It was a bitter sweet - mostly sweet - day for us as we celebrated Benjamin's first birthday! I know it is cliche, but man this year FLEW by! I have such vivid memories of Ben's first days, weeks and months with us. Unlike the fog that was Lily's infancy, I had a clear head for most of this year....most! What a blessing!

From day four, Ben has been out and about and a little ray of sunshine! I say day four because it was on his fourth day of life that he accompanied Grandma and me to lunch. I told my mom, "lets get out of the house now while the getting is good." I just knew that at any moment the depression would hit or colic would set in. Or he would have problems feeding. Or he'd be diagnoses with reflux.

It never happened.

A total joy ride this has been. Just like his big sister, Ben smiled, cuddled, giggled and charmed his way through this first year. And I anticipate he will take life on with all the same wonderful attributes.

A gentleman, yes. Party boy, I think so. He knew this was HIS day and he lead the celebration!

Happy birthday son. I have enjoyed every single moment of you - from the first days when you warmed my chest to your your first steps into my arms. You make our family complete - and a lot louder, for sure!

A Generous Soul

Hey Lily.

Did I hurt your feelings?

I'm sorry baby.

Am I paying too much attention to Ben? It is true that I am soaking him up these days. I simply can't help myself.

It's just that your little brother is about to turn one. One. Do you know what that means?

It means his chub will soon melt away. That delicious smell of baby - gone. His gummy smile will be replaced with teeth that need to be brushed. It means he won't want fall asleep under my chin, or grip my shoulder as I carry him through the halls. He will take a step - and then run - and then disappear with friends and girlfriends and.....well, you know. The babble will become words. His dependence will become independence. He wont throw his arms up in celebration when I walk in the room. The diapers will go. The bottles tossed. The toys and highchair and baby equipment off to consignment. The crib passed on to a family awaiting a new baby - a new bundle of chub and babble.

It's all just happening way too fast. I hope you understand that I just need to stare at him for one extra second. Hold him just a little longer. Rock him even though he is fast asleep. Because it will be over soon. This, this phase of my life. This raising of babies will be over soon.

I felt different with you. For you. I was so excited about every milestone that came your way. "Let's do it." "Wasn't that fun." "What's next."

Well now I know what is next. And its all great. But the problem with "what's next" is that it means something else won't happen ever again. And my mother-soul just swells with love and pride and sadness and loss all at the same time. And that familiar lump rests in my throat as I turn the lights off and lay in bed ---- thinking ---- about you two in the next room.

It's not that I love him more. I promise. This need to linger is for you both. I need to cherish all the miracles you have brought to my life, this very day that I will miss with such intensity and the joys I can only imagine ahead.

_____

Tomorrow is Saturday. We have fun plans. I am anxious to hold your hand. Rub noses and swap kisses. And rock you until you fall fast, fast asleep.

Lily - As you have from your first day as my daughter, you have given me room to feel my way through motherhood - even when it comes to the relationship between your brother and me. Thank you for giving me the past few days to endulge. I know it was tough to be so generous, and yet you do it with such grace.

Tomorrow is for us my Lily love. All for us.

Heart Ache.

Oh Ben. You are breaking my heart. And when boys used to break my heart, I would write them a letter and fold it up and never send it to them. I needed some place to pour all that heartache. But you are a little different. It's the good kind of heart break. The kind of pain that can only come from crazy, huge happiness.

You are a big chunk of crazy, huge happiness. You are so yummy that I think you should be bottled up and spread on a bagel! Benja-yumminess!

So instead of writing a letter and shoving it in my journal for no one to read, ever, here is a very public love fest in honor of you! Just a few of the thousands of reasons I am totally in love with you!

- your sunny blond hair sticks up in the funniest places. I love to peek in on you first thing in the morning to see what is sticking up where!

- You have like 10 teeth. Really. You smile and look like a three-year old. We call you the "man baby".

- Your nose crinkles when you smile and its adorable.

- You say, "bee, bee, bee" and I am not sure if you are saying Ben, bottle, bed, bye-bye or nothing at all. But you don't seem to be frustrated by our lack of understanding.

- You are so chill. Your sister tugs on you. You fell nose-first out of your high chair. I kiss all over your face. And you take it all with a smile.

- You love your new trucks. Somehow you know just what to do with them.

- You give the biggest kisses ever! And lots of them. I love the wet, gooey kisses more than just about anything.

- You point to your Papa every time you see him, like you are saying, "you da man." You guys are buddies already.

- You love your new car seat and sit up like a man-king!

I could just go on and on and on. You make me smile and laugh every day, my love!

So yes, my heart is breaking. But its okay little man. No hard feelings. I'll shed a tear and long for these moments that are going by too fast. But the good news is that I know something even better is waiting for me with every sunrise! You are the first face I see everyday, and I think, "what will my son-shine bring today!"